Learn how to acquire your Medical Marijuana Card in the US and Canada, and reap the benefits of this effective – and natural – medicine!

1. First off, if you’re in the US, you have to live in one of these States:

Source: ProCon.org

Replace the green with Blue and the grey and wavy purple with Red and you’ve near as damn got yourself a Political map to boot. If you’re in Canada, you don’t have to worry about where you’re living at all. All the better if you live near a dispensary, but if not, you can order medical cannabis online.

2. You have to have an ailment that cannabis can legally be used to treat.

We did an article on this recently. It’s most commonly prescribed for chronic pain, but in some States using weed to treat stress and anxiety is legal too.

Or, in the case of these guys, it’s also a treatment for being time-locked in 1969.

3. Go and see a licensed weed Doc.

Here’s a comprehensive list of licensed doctors who prescribe cannabis in the US, courtesy of United Patients Group, and Canada, courtesy of Marihuana for Medical Purposes Regulations. You can thank us later.

They probably won’t be sticking a stethoscope in your ear like above, but you never know.

4. Do the bureaucracy.

“While the State exists there can be no freedom,” as a certain someone very sagely said. But without the State there can be no legal medical marijuana dispensaries, so it does have its uses. The United Patients Group has a good article on the specific ins-and-outs of the bureaucratic process.

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5. Collect your card and head to the clinic.

Congratulations! You can now smoke up legally (in your own home, on your own). You’ve made it! Livin’ the dream, baby!

Soon you’ll be smiling manically like this chap in his ID photo.